Your child needs elective surgery, and a date has been scheduled. Unlike emergency surgery, an elective procedure gives you the time to prepare your child psychologically for the hospital and the surgery. Adequate preparation can help your child feel less anxious about the anesthesia induction and surgery and get through the recovery period faster. But, like parents everywhere, you are probably uncertain about the best ways to prepare your child.

The job is not as daunting as you may think. The key is in imparting information at your child's level of understanding, correcting misconceptions, and dispelling fears and feelings of guilt. You need to help your child understand the physical problem that requires the surgery and become familiar with the hospital and some of the procedures she will undergo. Children of all ages cope much better if they have some concrete idea of what is going to happen and why it is necessary. But, to do that, you need to prepare yourself first, and correct any misconceptions of your own.

Preparing Yourself
The horror stories you heard from grandparents and parents about traumatic parent/child separations and very limited hospital visiting hours belong to days gone by. Hospitals have changed enormously. For example, most surgeries performed on children are now "same-day" procedures requiring no overnight or prolonged stays; most children are back home, in their own beds, the same night.

Furthermore, most U.S. hospitals and more than half of all Canadian hospitals permit at least one parent to stay beside the child at all times except while the surgeon is operating. After the surgery, you may return to your child in the recovery room. As your child awakens, she will assume you never left.

Ask the doctors, nurses, or staff for the information you need about what is to take place so that you can prepare your child and deal with your own fears or concerns. To parents, one of the most fearful aspects of surgery is anesthesia. In today's hospitals, anesthesiologists - using modern, safe anesthetics and assisted by extremely capable monitoring technology - administer anesthesia very safely.

In the few cases where hospitalization is required overnight or longer, most hospitals avoid separation anxiety by permitting at least one parent to stay with the child day and night. Other close family members may be able to visit at the family's convenience (not just during limited visiting hours). As soon as your child is able, she may be playing with other children, toys, and games in a children's recreation room - even if that involves taking along an IV bag on a rolling support.