Your child's doctor can be an incredible resource when you have questions and concerns about your child's health, but finding time to fit in your child's regular checkups and sick visits may be a stretch for your already jam-packed schedule. Your child's doctor may be overbooked and overscheduled, too, so making the most of your time together is important. What are the best ways to communicate your concerns and questions to your child's doctor? And how can you strengthen your relationship with the doctor who plays a prominent role in your child's health?

The Doctor-Patient Relationship
Gone are the days of routine house calls and bartering livestock for health care and medicine. The current-day reality of insurance co-pays and crowded waiting rooms means relationships between doctors and patients have changed drastically. Today, doctors are pressured to see more patients in less time and to spend less time with each patient. Insurance issues, such as the need for referrals, complicate patient care for parents as well as doctors and their offices.

The increasing complexities of the health care system mean that parents have to take charge of their child's care. In the past, parents may have known far less about their child's health, growth, and development, but the health information that's readily available on the Internet, in bookstores, and on TV suggests that parents are more informed than ever. This is good news, because parents who actively participate in their child's health care help to ensure that their child receives the best care possible. In some cases, though, parents who do their own research may find incomplete or inaccurate medical and health information. Parents armed with stacks of printouts from unreliable Internet sources could find themselves at odds with a tense and frustrated doctor who doesn't have time to corroborate or dispute every source.

Another common problem that may hinder a good relationship with your child's doctor is unrealistic expectations or an unwillingness to trust a doctor's diagnosis or treatment of a minor illness. For example, many parents expect a drug or medicine for common colds, when a wait-and-see approach may be better. As a result, some doctors may feel pressured to give in to parental expectations for prescriptions or treatment, even when it's not necessary or in the best interest of the child's health.

Communicating With Your Child's Doctor
The key to building a better relationship with your child's doctor is open communication and reasonable expectations. What can you expect from your child's doctor? He or she should:

• help you monitor your child's health
• explain your child's growth and development and what you can expect
• diagnose and treat your child's minor or moderately serious illnesses
• provide referrals and work with specialists in the case of illnesses requiring special expertise

Your child's pediatrician, family doctor, or nurse practitioner can also help you with other children's health issues, including exercise, nutrition, and weight issues; behavioral and emotional issues; how to cope with family issues, such as death, separation, and >divorce; and how to understand and seek treatment for learning disabilities.

Good communication is a two-way street. You can aid communication by letting the doctor know that you trust him or her to care for your child. It's OK to ask your child's doctor questions, but let your child's doctor know that you want decisions, diagnoses, and prescriptions to be based on the best decision for the health of your child, not what's easier for you or makes you feel better.

You should also be as prepared as possible with the details during your child's doctor visits. When he or she asks you how your child is doing, be ready to share any concerns or ask any questions. It's best to be specific - for example, telling your child's doctor details about symptoms, such as that your child vomited three times last night, has had a temperature of 102 degrees Fahrenheit (39 degrees Celsius), and is having diarrhea helps the doctor assess your child's condition more readily than just saying, "my child's sick."

You may want to jot down your questions and concerns before you enter the exam room so that you're sure to remember to ask. And if you're worried about symptoms your child is having, mention them to the doctor even if he or she doesn't ask. The more information you provide about your child, the better the doctor will be able to assess your child's health.