Transitional Objects
Almost everyone knows about the cartoon character Linus and his
blanket. He drags it around wherever he goes, nibbling on its
corner or curling up with it when the going gets tough. Security
objects such as blankets are part of the emotional support system
every child needs in his early years.
Your child may not choose a blanket, of course. He may prefer a
soft toy or even the satin trim on Mom's bathrobe. Chances are,
he'll make his choice between months eight and twelve, and he'll
keep it with him for years to come. When he's tired, it will help
him get to sleep. When he's separated from you, it will reassure
him. When he's frightened or upset, it will comfort him. When
he's in a strange place, it will help him feel at home.
These special comforts are called "transitional objects," because
they help children make the emotional transition from dependence
to independence. They work, in part, because they feel good:
They're soft, cuddly, and nice to touch. They're also effective
because of their familiarity. This so-called "lovey" has your
child's scent on it and it reminds him of the comfort and
security of his own room. It makes him feel that everything is
going to be okay.
Despite myths to the contrary, transitional objects are not a
sign of weakness or insecurity, and there's no reason to keep
your child from using one. In fact, a transitional object can be
so helpful that you may want to help him choose one and build it
into his nighttime ritual. From early infancy you might try
keeping a small, soft blanket or toy in his crib. He may ignore
it at first, but if it's always there he'll probably take to it
eventually.
You can also make things easier for yourself by having two
identical security objects. This will allow you to wash one while
the other is being used, thus sparing your baby (and yourself) a
potential emotional crisis and a very bedraggled "lovey." If your
baby chooses a large blanket for his security object, you can
easily turn it into two by cutting it in half. He has little
sense of size, and won't notice the change. If he's chosen a toy
instead, try to find a duplicate as soon as possible. If you
don't start rotating them early, your child may refuse the second
one because it feels too new and foreign.
Parents often worry that transitional objects promote thumb
sucking, and in fact they sometimes (but not always) do. But it's
important to remember that thumb or finger sucking is a normal,
natural way for a young child to comfort himself. He'll gradually
give up both the transitional object and the sucking as he
matures and finds other ways to cope with stress.
Back to Caring for Your Baby and Young Child: Birth to Age 5
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